Medium: Oil on canvas
Size: 75 x 90 cm
I was painting a view of Tallinn in the wintertime, and it just didn’t work. I let the painting dry, changed the colour, tried again, nothing. I painted it in more detail, but it still did not work. So many works go literally to chimney because I can’t convey what I see and feel. Inadequacy. Insanely irritating.
It was a charming winter morning motif: small downtown streets, cool shadows, morning sun in warm colours, steaming chimneys, clean tones. Ideal. Maybe even too perfect. During my short journey of expressing myself through painting, I have already learned quite a lot. And I am terrified of these overly beautiful subjects that feel unreal. I can’t handle perfection; the painting must be authentic.
I abandoned this idea and searched for my notebook. I found a warm moment from a trip to Italy, Siena. The narrow streets of the old town, photographed probably a billion times by all the world’s tourists who have come to search for this particular feeling of belonging – convinced of the idea that they were Italians in their previous life.
Italy is simple; you can paint any corner of almost any street, and it is immortal art.
So I painted a simple narrow street of Siena, with dark shadows in front and a brighter view at the back. When I was finished, to my amazement, I saw the inaccessible scene – Tallinn street in winter morning coming to life.
Our actions and intentions have consequences, some with short and some with long shadows, depending on the matter. I like to think there are no coincidences, but there is karma.